Sermon Notes

Broken Values: Marriage      5-21-17

Bottom Line:  When Jesus is part of our marriage, our promises become much more important.



 A. I don’t remember a lot about our wedding!

   1. Events, highlights, people, music, but a lot of blur

   2. I know I made some promises

 B. My first wedding to perform was in 1974

   1. Two months of fulltime ministry & 2 yrs of marriage

   2. The expert, voice of authority, wisdom, & guidance

 C. Little has changed over the decades

   1. A marriage ceremony is a public covenant

   2. Vows = promises, family, friends, & God = witnesses

 D. For much of history and in most cultures, the covenant was between parents and not to people in love!

   1. No romance, no love story, no picking the perfect one

   2. It was a deal, arrangement, settlement or bargain,

       Unite & consolidate power & wealth, pure profit

    * Romeo & Juliet – Tevye’s three daughters

 E. God’s plan was simple & clear – Jesus in Mt.19:3-9

   1. Restating the original law – Moses changed – Grace?

   2. #1 biblical truth:  a promise is a promise! Keep it!

 F. Broken values exist because promises aren’t kept!

   1. Don’t make one = ignore God’s plan & social tradition

   2. If I make a promise – I can change my mind

   *Green Bay Packer running back, Paul Horning, was asked why he had his marriage ceremony before noon:  “Because if it didn’t work out, I didn’t want to blow the whole day.”

 G. Jesus makes a difference: in the promise & the plan!

   1. He changed husband’s view of wife & wife’s view of

       her husband.  Eph.5:21-33

   2. She’s not property or servant & he’s not Lord

 H. If Christ is the umbrella:  Four C’s of Marriage Values

1.  Care

 A. “Love as their own bodies…feeds & cares…like Christ”

 B. “Leave father and mother” – separate family

 C. “Become one” – procreation & togetherness = unity

2.  Consideration

 A. Thankful = blessed and unworthy not trapped

 B. Thoughtful = how can I make life more enjoyable for them?  Thinking unselfishly isn’t easy or natural…

   1. Problem of immaturity and selfishness

   2. You MUST choose to be thoughtful

 C. 40 Promises for Marriage – ideas!

3.  Communication

 A. There is no relationship without communication!

 B. If you don’t communicate you speculate!

 C. Love is both a walk and a talk!  Requires acts & words

   * The right kind of talking = 1 Cor.13:4-8

4.  Commitment

 A. Most important element in marriage – next to God!

   * It drives Care, Consideration, and Communication!

 B. Commitment means doing whatever it takes!

   * Maturity is accepting 100% of responsibility to solve

      problems!  Not about whose fault or turn.  Do it!

 C. Christ-like commitment?  “gave himself up for her”


A. What one thing do those w/ marriage struggles need to hear?  What is forgotten or ignored the most?

B. The blessing and bonding that comes from working through problems!

C. “I can’t!” = 2 Cor.12:8-10   Grace works for marriage too!